We are together again … Now what?

Table of Contents

Previous Chapter: Meeting your ex

You are a thing again and hopefully you are stronger, better and more attractive than before. You have been patient, disciplined and in control of your emotions.

This process did not only help you to get your ex back, it made you a stronger individual.

Now what?

First, continue to focus on yourself and improve yourself. Most second tries don’t work but this is because:

The dumpee did not focus on improving themselves after the breakup

Or they stopped improving themselves and went back to the old habits after getting their ex back.

If you both go back to who you were before the breakup, the old problems would arise again and you would probably not last long. 

Second, I hope no contact rule showed you that your partner is not the source of your happiness or center of your life. Your partner is your companion not your center. You should be the center of your life. I don’t mean you selfishly focus on yourself but keep your desires, needs and goals first as much as you can do. You now know you could be without them if necessary so you should feel stronger.
You also forget about this Hollywood bullshit of “You complete me”. Uncomplete people trying to complete each other is a recipe for a disaster. If you want a long lasting relationship you should realize this:

“A good relationship is built by two complete people sharing their completeness with each other. Not by people who try to complete their missing “half” by one another.”

Most people are dumped because they change into a dependent and weaker version of themselves in the relationship. They become someone different. This breakup gave you an opportunity to chase your completeness and reclaim it if you had it before. Don’t be dependent and weak again. Don’t sacrifice yourself for the relationship. Don’ forget this:

If you make your partner the center of your life, they would probably push them out of your life.”

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